Forgiving my out-of-date physics for a moment,
do you suppose that the electrons in the outer
shells of higher elements like Germanium and
Magnesium get jealous of the electrons closer

to the nucleus? Do their children reject the
culture of the outer shells and crave the so-called
"hipness" of the inner shells? Do they dream of
one day living in the low-energy parts of the atom

with all the other "cool" electrons? What's the
commute like between shells? Did the outer
electrons settle there because rent is cheaper?
Are there better jobs out there? Less street crime?

Do the inner shell electrons shriek with mock
horror at a recent trip to shell 8, where they
ran into electron 57, who didn't even know what
a saketini was? Do the outer electrons complain

about the bludging, drug-taking, black-wearing
inner shell electrons? Do they call them wankers
when they discuss them with their friends? And
when engaged in ionic transfer, or when induced

by external forces to release discrete quanta of energy
and visit the inner shells, are there awkward pauses
at parties where nobody knows what CD to put
on, or do they loosen up after a few drinks and

realise that deep down they're all fundamentally
the same - all ultimately part of the same atom,
all carrying a charge of negative one as they
flicker in invisible silence around the nucleus?