he's living in (the le corbusier machines
security guard by the red brick entrance
intercoms titanium silver bullet buttons
first time i buzz i'm running away down
a path lined with rusting hills hoists but
the concrete's grey i crawl back along its
dawn shadowed expressway hit it again
waiting for the answer his voice rockets
down the wires & i hear it is eradication
the steel doors pop & i'm in the elevator
red bricks shutter & glass eludes the eye
an automaton answers the wooden door
morphing into the half father protector
his voice too is dopplers with fear filled
alarm I begin my litany my voice rising
clipped flooding panic breathe slowly &
explain he's taking it all well admitting
to his actions sad & half my father half
the father who took me into a dimmed
confidence as mad intervention ripples
introduce my millenarian grandmother
his filipino wife who remains shocked
a cousin of mine is also there why I'm
not so sure even so we discuss matters
calmly his new wife accepts my young
age & her husband's indecency crosses
line the walls of their living apartment
he appears old frail preoccupied with
bottling beer (it's the pressure you see
one must avoid pops they disrupt the
fermentation I see the shredded ginger
swirling among sugar crystals & green
glass grandma nods sagely at last there
is a silence & I no longer need to speak
of pain of validation of rejection or of
religion speaks for itself in crosses &
candles their meanings now revealing
tears of wax it is a miracle the statues
in a row like rock & roll dolls set lists
touchographies fit only to be auctioned
on ebay now curiosities or new words
in a language spoken by dried leaves